Communicate with Power Words
That Grab Attention, and Compel Action

Okay, sure I have a way of parenting, but is it really working?
Learn how to find your parenting style through experimenting with different words, tones of voice. Now this may feel a little awkward, but work with me here.

Close your eyes and think of a super hero. Anyone will do...it could even be a cultural or spiritual hero if that feels more natural for you.

Start talking to that person. Hear that person responding. Visualize the conversation for a few minutes, then open your eyes and come back here.

No peeking! Take the time to really think this one through.

Okay, welcome back.
It's pretty cool to talk to your hero, right? You must have been pretty excited that someone you really admire and respect had the time and kindness to spend some time with you.

Now consider these questions:

• How was the balance between your voices?
• Who spoke louder?
• Who spoke more confidently?
• Who lead the conversation?

We're going to do this again. This time, it is a conversation between you and your child. If you have more than one, concentrate on just one of them for now. Just replay a typical conversation with that child.

Now close your eyes again...

Stop peeking! ;-)

Welcome back...and consider the questions again:

• How was the balance between your voices?
• Who spoke louder?
• Who spoke more confidently?
• Who lead the conversation?

Well, how did you do?
If your conversations with your hero and your child left you as the mild-mannered-reporter-type, you probably need to pump up your volume.

Don't you agree that you deserve to be a hero in your child's life? We think you do. But only you can make that happen.

Your children have the innate tendency to push the limits of your authority. That can not be changed, so you might have decided to pick a different battle (which, in many circumstances, is a wise thing to do). However, if your conversations with your children have left them in charge, you definitely have some adjustments to make.

Be the hero
The secret to creating a different communication balance, and refining your parenting style, isn't as hard as you think. But, you'll have to be a good sport about it. This technique can turn the mildest most passive, timid parent into a super star if it is applied with heart and soul.

Dip back into your conversation with your hero. What elements of that person's voice can you incorporate into your "key moment" speeches?

Key moments are those times when it counts:

• There is a super important job at hand
• The family is facing a major issue
• Your child is in serious danger
• You really need to emphasize a point - positive or constructive

Overusing the Power Parent voice technique can backfire, so save it for key moments.

Alright, already, how do I do it?
It's so easy, you'll laugh when you read it. When you are ready to deliver your "key moment" speech, remember these steps...

• Take a deep breath
• Lower your normal voice a few notes
• Picture your hero in your mind
• Look the person in the eye
• Speak from your diaphragm in a hero-like, or radio announcer voice

That's it?
Hey, what more did you want for free parenting advice?

Seriously, practice this in the mirror a few times and you'll feel more confident, sound more authoritative, capture your children's attention, even cause a few good natured giggles around your house. Get your spouse involved, and double the fun. You might find it inspires a different dynamic between the two of you as well, and we all know that can't hurt.

Not bad stuff when you consider the normal course of events...mom or dad declares something, kids continue playing video games or watching the tube, mom and dad raise voice, kids ignore them some more, mom and dad get really ticked and say it louder, shut off the TV and the fighting escalates. No one wins. Everyone is angry, bitter and feeling disrespected.

The technique we're suggesting may not always work, but it should set up a more playful, respectful, balanced way for you to get your points across effectively, and avoid many major confrontations. Once that voice gets old and less effective, switch it up.

If you are going for even more extreme and unpredictable version, you can use specific, distinct voices and switch it up periodically. The Swedish Chef from the Muppets, Monty Python style, the Count from Sesame Street, whatever gets the attention, lightens the mood and makes the conversation stick.

Give it a try and let us know how it works for you!

Find creative ideas on words and phrases that get kids attention Back to Top Ten Tips Back to Power Parent Home